Weirdest Board Games for Kids of All Time

Long before video and computer games, board games ruled the roost. And they still have their fans.

Whether rooted in the trends of their day or meant to be learning tools, some are stranger than others in theme and gameplay.

These are the weirdest board games for kids of all time.

26. Mall Madness

Manufacturer: Milton Bradley

Year launched: 1987

Still available: Yes

Bottom line: Teen girls and shopping were always synonymous concepts. In Mall Madness, each player is given $200 and uses the spinner and the electronic computer to reach a store to shop in. Once they do, they can shop 'till they drop. The first player to spend all their loot is the winner. 

In its earliest incarnation, the board was shaped like an audio cassette until it was flipped open. 

While malls aren’t so much a thing anymore, we can’t help but wonder if the game manufacturer won’t come out with an online shopping-themed version eventually. But that probably wouldn’t be nearly as much fun as hanging out with friends in the food court.

25. Masterpiece

Manufacturer: Parker Brothers

Year launched: 1970

Still available: No

Bottom line: The object of the game is to outbid other wealthy art aficionados for classic paintings by artists such as Van Gogh, Rembrandt and da Vinci and try not to lose it all on a worthless forgery.

Each player has a character bio that describes how they came into the art world, and it’s usually through ill-gotten gains, which will go directly over your head unless you’re an adult.

Still, the game introduced millions of kids to fine art. 

24. Mr. T Game

Manufacturer: Milton Bradley

Year launched: 1983

Still available: No

Bottom line: Much like in his mid-1980s cartoon, you're on Mr. T’s gym team. As a member, you’ll travel a lot and have to make it to the airport on time to catch your flight, but there are plenty of mundane errands to run before you go. 

Each player has to pick up their gym clothes from the dry cleaners, stop off for a quick goodbye to the team mascot, and report a crime.

The first person who makes their flight wins. 

23. Let’s Be Safe

Manufacturer: Milton Bradley

Year launched: 1986

Still available: No 

Bottom line: The 1980s were all about safety and what better way to teach kids than with a board game.

As they move from space to space, players are asked questions about everything from stranger danger to saying no to drugs. Awkward fun for the whole family.

22. The Game Of Life

Manufacturer: Milton Bradley

Year launched: 1960

Still available: Yes

Bottom line: Life takes players through major life events, such as graduating college, getting married, having kids, buying a home, working and retiring.

The goal is to have the most assets by the time you reach your golden years. It comes with stress and health tokens, just like real adulthood. 

21. Mr. Bacon's Big Adventure

Manufacturer: Archie McPhee

Year launched: 2009

Still available: Yes

Bottom line: Each player is a piece of bacon who goes on a long journey through Meatland via Mustard Marsh, Wiener Wasteland and the mighty Sausage Sea. Vegan Alley can bring you right back to the starting line, and Gristle Grotto is no picnic either.

The first piece of bacon who makes it to the Great Frying Pan is the winner. Yes, you win by becoming a nutritious part of someone's breakfast. 

20. What Shall I Be? The Exciting Game of Career Girls

Manufacturer: Selchow & Righter

Year launched: 1966

Still available: No

Bottom line: Players collect school, subject, and personality cards. The first person who gets the required amount of cards matching their profession wins. These professions are teacher, stewardess, actress, nurse, model and ballet dancer. 

When Career Girls came out in the mid-1960s, it was not so strange, but by today’s standards, it shines a light on how few options women had and how far we've come. 

19. Lie, Cheat & Steal

Manufacturer: Reiss

Year launched: 1971

Still available: No

Bottom line: Lie, Cheat & Steal, which came out during the Nixon administration, is a game of dirty politics and shows kids not all is what it seems when it comes to running the country. 

Players try to get elected to office in nefarious ways, as the title suggests. These include buying votes, libel and backdoor deals.

18. Uranium Rush

Manufacturer: Gardner & Co.

Year launched: 1955

Still available: No

Bottom line: The 1950s were the era of nuclear power and what better way to introduce kids to the idea than by introducing them to a game in which they mine radioactive materials. There’s even an electric Geiger counter that buzzes when they hit the uranium jackpot. 

The person who makes the most money from their loot wins the game. Don’t forget your protective suit. 

17. Don’t Wake Daddy

Manufacturer: Milton Bradley

Year launched: 1992

Still available: Yes

Bottom line: You’re hungry, it’s late at night, and everybody is asleep, particularly daddy. As you go around the board, you have to make sure you don’t land on something that might wake him up.

If you do, he may sleep through it or he will pop out of his spring-loaded bed.

Boy, will you be in trouble.

16. The Sinking of the Titanic

Manufacturer: Ideal 

Year launched: 1975

Still available: No

Bottom line: The Titanic is sinking, and you’re the passengers' only hope. You must try to rescue people as the ship goes down and get them on lifeboats.

After the ship sinks, it is your job to make sure they have enough food and water on their tropical island. (Needless to say, the real ship went down in the North Atlantic). The first player whose group has been rescued wins. 

Time plus tragedy equals a really strange board game.

15. Offshore Oil Strike

Manufacturer: Printabox Limited

Year launched: 1973

Still available: No 

Bottom line: If there’s one thing kids love, it’s oil production.

Players identify as BP, Amoco, Chevron, or Mobil, build offshore platforms and lay pipelines in the face of ocean storms and other challenges.

The first player that walks away with $120,000,000 is the winner. 

14. Pie Face

Manufacturer: Hasbro

Year launched: NA

Still available: Yes

Bottom line: The title is self explanatory — players put their head in a device which also contains a sponge loaded with shaving cream.

As they move around the board, depending on where they land, they may or may not get creamed. The person who leaves the table unscathed wins.

A fun, passive-aggressive way of getting back at a family member.

13. Unexploded Cow

Manufacturer: Cheapass Games

Year launched: 2001

Still available: Yes

Bottom line: Players bring their cows riddled with mad cow disease from England to France, which for whatever reason, is loaded with land mines.

The person who avoids their herds’ demise via the mines or disease wins the game.

Sounds like a real blast.

12. Bigfoot The Giant Snow Monster

Manufacturer: Milton Bradley

Year launched: 1977

Still available: Yes

Bottom line: Players act as prospectors in Alaska. The lure of gold is too great to stay away from, even though the legendary Bigfoot has been sighted in the mountains. Any run-in with the giant apeman guarantees removal from the game, with the last survivor the victor. 

It seems like game designers got their primate/person hybrid mixed up. A yeti is generally a snow monster. Sasquatch roams the lower 48.

11. The Bermuda Triangle

Manufacturer: 1975

Year launched: Milton Bradley

Still available: No

Bottom line: Players are represented by cargo ships and must deliver their cargo to port. Those who arrive when prices are higher get more for what they carry. The more they make, the greater their chances are of winning. 

But there’s a supernatural element involved when beating the other ships — the Bermuda Triangle. On the board, there’s a mysterious cloud represented by a piece of plastic with magnets that can pick up, move, or figuratively destroy the ships it passes over. 

10. Payday

Manufacturer: Parker Bros

Year launched: 1975

Still available: Yes

Bottom line: Payday is another one of those games that simulates adulthood. Players have to meet their expenses during a one-month calendar for a specific number of months.

The person who has the most money and least debt at the end of that time wins the game.

You’ll get there soon enough, kids. 

9. Town Dump

Manufacturer: Milton Bradley

Year launched: 1977

Still available: No

Bottom line: Players surround a board of garbage and take turns putting it in the town dump, with the objective of removing it from their area. The person who is successful at cleaning their location first wins. 

You won’t be moving all this trash by hand either. Each game comes with a "motorized action bulldozer."

8. Breaker 19: The CB Truckers Game

Manufacturer: Milton Bradley

Year launched: 1976

Still available: No

Bottom line: CB radios and trucking were popular kid fodder in the mid-1970s, and of course, there’s a board game to prove it.

Players move from place to place on the board to deliver and drop off their loads. The first to complete two deliveries and pay $2,500 to the bank to keep their truck wins the game. 

The board comes with a lengthy glossary of CB slang terms and a code signal list that you have to keep referring to throughout, which makes hitting the road much less exciting. 

7. Squatter

Manufacturer: Jedko Games

Year launched: 1960

Still available:  Yes

Bottom line: A very popular game in Australia about sheep farming. Each player has a station stocked with 3,000 sheep, which they have to improve to buy more of. As they move around the board, they find there are costs, plans that can go awry and natural predators. 

The first person with 6,000 sheep happily grazing on an irrigated farm wins the game. If you’re interested in the intricacies of sheep farming Down Under, this is the game for you.

6. NBC: TV News Game

Manufacturer: Dadan Inc.

Year launched: 1962

Still available:  No

Bottom line: A kind of early version of Trivial Pursuit with questions about geography and current events.

It's notable mostly because it is just a trivia game. There’s no "TV news" aspect about it, other than the image of then NBC News anchor Chet Huntley on the box and on the board. 

5. Doggie Doo

Manufacturer: Goliath Games

Year launched: 2009

Still available: Yes

Bottom line: It's a game about cleaning your dog’s poop. You feed him, squeeze his leash, then he does his business. If you clean it up, you get a desired fart token. The first person to collect three fart tokens wins. 

Doggie Doo also comes with sound effects for added realism.

4. Flushin’ Frenzy

Manufacturer: Mattel

Year launched: 2018

Still available: Yes

Bottom line: Not to be outdone by Doggie Doo, Flushin' Frenzy is based around the theme of a clogged toilet. Players roll the dice to plunge it a number times, and if what's brown doesn’t go down, it may fly out of the toilet.

To win a token, you have to grab the poo with your bare hands. To make the pot even sweeter, catching it in mid-air earns you two tokens. 

3. Vanilla Ice Electronic Rap Game

Manufacturer: International Games

Year launched: 1991

Still available: No 

Bottom line: One-hit wonder Vanilla Ice was so big he had his own rap game. Rhyming cards with points are placed on the game board, and every time a line of cards is complete, the player delivers the lyric to the beats from the electronic beatbox included. 

The player with the most points wins and must rap the entire board at the end of the game. Word to your mother.

2. Murder, She Wrote

Manufacturer: Warren Company

Year launched: 1985

Still available: No

Bottom line: This is the Clue board game for Angela Lansbury fans. One player is the murderer, and the others play detectives who try to figure out their identity.

If the murder kills five witnesses and escapes before they are caught, they win the game. If a detective discovers who the murderer is, they win. 

A sweet game to play with your mystery-loving grandma. 

1. Pit

Manufacturer: Parker Brothers

Year launched: 1903

Still available: Yes

Bottom line: Children long to enter the high-stakes world of stock trading, and they can do so with Pit, one of the oldest games on this list. It is like trading on Wall Street, but in the comfort of your own home. There’s even a little bell in some editions.

Developed by clairvoyant Edgar Cayce, players trade commodity cards all at once (there are no turns).

When someone has nine cards with the same commodity, they win a round. The person that scores points equal to the number value of their commodity and reaches the point total first wins.